


Kid

by harryandthestars



Series: marvel fucking me up [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), infinity war - Fandom
Genre: Death, Grief, How could they do this to me, I Don't Even Know, I can't believe they did this, I can't right now, I don't even want Marvel to have a bit of my money anymore, I hate death, I hate life, If you didn't watch the movie don't read this, Infinity War fucked me up so bad, Infinity War spoilers, JK i love them, Sad Tony, Sadness, but still, sad me, unsaid i love you's
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 07:43:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14468103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harryandthestars/pseuds/harryandthestars
Summary: The only thing that outweighs grief is grief.





	Kid

**Author's Note:**

> “Mr. Stark, I don’t want to go…”

Grief prolongs everything.

A few seconds ago, Peter disintegrated. A few seconds ago, everything in Tony collapsed in a singularity.

He cannot form thoughts or words. He stares blankly at the spot where Peter vanished into nothingness, looking at it with horror, distant horror, because Tony does not understand. He has mourned before, but this is beyond sadness—this is grief.

Unadulterated grief, piercing Tony with everything it has. It spreads through his body like a virus, a virus he faces in denial, because,  _no, this is impossible, the kid cannot be dead, the kid cannot be gone._ He closes and opens his eyes, knowing that Peter will reappear, a dumb smile on his face, saying,  _I gotcha there, Mr. Stark._ And Thanos would be dead, Tony would rebuke, but he would be happy, so happy, because everything would be okay, because everything is okay. 

But it's not. And another side effect of grief is its sudden bluntness. The virus has spread everywhere, and Tony can feel the reality, the gruesome, horrible, unfair reality, in which Peter is gone, Peter is dead. 

Just a day or so ago—it feels like a lifetime—Tony talked about having children. And now he lost his boy. His boy that whispered "I'm sorry" before he died, because he thought he failed Tony, when it was the exact opposite.

Grief causes memories to come back in flashes with painful clarity. He remembers meeting Peter, yelling at Peter, Peter trying to impress him, Peter not knowing his mere existence made him smile— _Peter, Peter, Peter._ Kid. Kid. Kid. 

And so, the howling comes. Emotion that is yet another side effect of grief. The tears come, but the tears cannot seep through the soil to plant Peter back to life. But Tony shouts into the void, into the unknown and the unhearing, words that he has never said to Peter, but words that are so true nonetheless. 

I love you.

There are no replies. Only the faint whooshing of the breeze, as if Tony had the ability to conjure wind, but not Peter.

His shoulders shaking, Tony clings to that spot where the kid used to lay with everything he has. Because right now, it is everything he has.

**Author's Note:**

> ok. i know this was short, but i'm beyond grief rn. i know that everyone will probably be resurrected in the next one, but peter. tom holland. how can you. i can't even.
> 
> mr. stark, i don't feel so good. ))):
> 
> i'm in a pretty bad place right now, and this movie really depressed lmao. i really love tom holland's spider-man. he's just a kid. just a kid.
> 
> (if marvel does not bring back peter, guess which bitch ass company is gonna be sued by me and pretty much the whole world?)


End file.
